My First Riff on Responsibility

I often wonder where that old American can-do spirit went. My guess is that it left along with the concept of responsibility. Nothing is anyone's fault nowadays. They have a disease or a syndrome or it is just plain someone else's fault.

We make choices. That is what freedom is all about. You make a choice. If it doesn't turn out to be a good choice, then that's on you. Accept it and move on with your life.

My mother teaches nursing and has been a pediactric nurse for 37 years. She sees a lot of women who have chosen to be mommies without daddies. And that is fine. I know lots of women who do it successfully.

There are those, however, who use single motherhood as an excuse. They can't make classes or turn in an assignment or get any real study time because they have a child. Bullshit!

In the early 1980's my father was laid off from his job. There was still the mortgage and my ballet lessons and my brother's hockey. To pay all the bills, my mother worked the night shift.

The night shift, you say? So?

Every night Mom tucked us into bed. Then she worked the 11-7 shift (on top of her regular part-time shifts). She would get home after 7, take a bath and put on her pajamas---as if she had been in bed all night. She'd get us up and make us breakfast and get us off to school. As far as my brother and I were concerned, it was business as usual. I wouldn't even find out how close they came to losing the house until I was 30.

Now I agree, it was easier for her because she did have a supportive, loving partner. So, let's look at what she did when Dad was working. My mother was at the hospital 3 days a week. She also gave tours of the facility, taught Cpr and first aid classes and was the president of her nursing school alumni. She took on both cub scouts and girl scouts at the same time. She was always our roommother at school and was the president of PTA while we were in elementary, junior high and high school. As a nurse, she was always asked and always accepted to chaperone fieldtrips. She spent 12 years getting a second Bachelor's in education. The house was cleaned once a week, but always looked like it had been done that day. Dinner was always on the table at 5:30. All while raising 2 children who turned out pretty good.

All I'm saying is, it's hard but it can be done. If you are willing to take the responsibility of your choice and put in the work it can be done! If your not willing, maybe you should think twice before...well, conceiving.